Rebbetzen Tziporah – Be In The Moment

 Dear friends,

Rabbi Yitzchak Grossman had the gift of being in the moment. For him, each door had to be opened. The key was his willingness to connect to the person or situation that Hashem puts in front of him. He lives in sort of all year Elul.

He was in a hotel for Shabbos when in the States. He left the door of his room slightly open in order to avoid using the plastic “keys” that open the door electronically. After a more than a day’s worth of day, and a late night, he headed up to his room and discovered a man sleeping in his bed. He looked at the sleeping fellow and everything about him gave away his identity – he was clearly homeless. 

At this point, the Rav asked himself the question that I wouldn’t have asked. “What will happen if I wake him up? I will get into bed, and where will he go this time of night?” He walked down to the lobby and slept on one of the couches or chairs.

What would I have done?

I wouldn’t have asked the question.

I would have gone down and asked for security.

What does this have to do with Elul?

LOOKING FOR SOMEONE?

The astral sign of Elul is the virgin (Virgo), the young woman who is still searching for the one with whom she can become whole. Many of us feel whole in the same way a new baby feels whole. For him, the world has a population of 1. When you are willing to open your eyes, think beyond yourself, and ask about the meaning of the moment you are living, what its possibilities are, you will find that you live in a world with a much much larger population. Elul is a good time to ask yourself how big your world is. Rav Grossman is one of a kind, but so are you.

YOU HAVE A MAP

When you turn on light in dark places, the effect is far brighter. The world itself is a paradox that becomes more and more extreme with passing time. The word ha-teva (the nature) is the same number value as the Divine Name Elokim, Master of forces. The natural world can be overwhelming. It can blind you to Hashem’s presence, and to your role. You may even come to think that there is no way to open the door to meaning and settle on pleasure and/or status as a substitute.

I was in Prague two weeks ago. It was the second stop on a really wonderful tour of middle Europe. It is the only city in the Czech Republic, so the government sees that it attracts tourists. The houses are painted pastel colors, the gargoyles and bizarre statues that are virtually everywhere are more visible than ever. There are no children, women, or scenes of natural beauty. Violence and victory is repeated again and again (there was even a scene of what I was told is the akaida in which Avraham is holding a large club about to kill Yitzchak). 

It is simultaneously a city of incredible physical light and beauty and darkness. Our guide, an unusually sensitive and highly educated non-Jewish woman (with a doctorate in Jewish studies from Charles University in Prague) was fully aware of the city’s ambivalence. When I noticed her spirituality and strong sense of morality, I asked her if she is religious. She said “The 46 years of communism did a job on our country. I am nothing, and so are most Czechs.” 

She wasn’t using the phrase “I am nothing” the way a baal mussar would use it. Her intent was that she has no map to guide her, and she has no idea of which elements of the past are real, or how to address them to the present or future. She has a strong intuitive sense of good and bad, and clearly from the way she described the transit concentration camp at Theresienstadt, wants to bring light to dark places, but no way to bring Hashem into the picture.

You do. We do.

We don’t have to do it alone. We can say “Ani Le’dodi”, I am for my beloved, and know that there is an answering voice, “VeDodi Li”, my Beloved is for me. Hashem wants you to be able to find Him and to feel the light of His presence in yourself, in the people you encounter, and in His world.

In Perkei Avos we are told to think of three things to avoid sin. The first is “know from where you came.” There is one answer for all of us. We all begin life as a microscopic bit of semen. Everything you have become since the moment you were conceived is a gift. Your sight. Your mind. 

The ability to achieve, to accomplish, to love, to enjoy, are all gifts from the One who loves you far more than you love yourself. The second thing is to remember where you are headed – to a grave in which your body will decay. Your soul, however, doesn’t decay. It will find the connection and the light that it longed for throughout your lifetime. 

You may have buried this longing under a kaleidoscope of material sensation (if you ever happen to be in Vienna, visit the Shonbrun palace. It gives you the ability to redefine “over the top”). You can even forget that you have a soul. 

Let yourself reflect on the fate of your body so that you have room for your soul. The last thing to remember is that you will account to G-d for the way you lived. He is your Father, your Lover, and will bring you to your tikkun allowing each of us (to use the words of the Leshem) tikvat Yisrael, the hope of every Jew, the fulfillment of finding our Beloved. In the meantime, get rid of your overweight spiritual baggage! Teshuvah is easier now than ever.

 

Ketiva vechatimah tovah, and much love,

Tziporah