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12 November 2026

Rabbi Winston: Parashas Toldos

 ONLY 21 DAYS until Chanukah, b”H. I’m not exactly sure why but, of all the chagim, Chanukah speaks to me the most. Every year I feel an “obligation” to write another book about the holiday, going deeper than the previous ones. Someone recently told me that they nicknamed me the “Chanukah Rabbi” because I write about it so much. I’m inspired.

This year’s version, in case you did not see the note at the end of last week’s Perceptions, is called, “Chanukah Forever: The Awesomely Eternal Reality of Chanukah.” It’s not just me writing about Chanukah in more depth. It is me sharing my personal journey into the depth of Chanukah. I write organically, so even I am surprised by some of things that show up on paper in the end.

The point of the book is nothing new. It shows how Chanukah, like Purim, though only a rabbinic holiday has serious Torah roots. What is new in this book is that some of those roots are not so obvious, or what they lead to. It’s what you find when you follow Ben Bag Bag’s advice in Pirkei Avos: 

Turn the Torah over and over for everything is in it. Look into it, grow old and worn over it, and never move away from it, for you will find no better portion than it. (Pirkei Avos 5:26)

This is, after all, what Chanukah is all about. The soul of Chanukah is the Ohr HaGanuz. The soul of everything is the Ohr HaGanuz, because God made Creation with it. But there is something specifically about Chanukah that draws our attention to this, more than Purim or even all the Torah chagim. I address all of that in my new book.

For now, I just want to point out how ultimately, this was the difference between Ya’akov and Eisav in this week’s parsha. Ya’akov lives inside the tents of Torah while Eisav was a man of the world. Their worlds met head-on when Eisav came home close to death and demanded Ya’akov feed him. Ya’akov, seeing Eisav for what he was, used the opportunity to distance Eisav from the future Jewish People by “selling” Eisav his food for Eisav’s birthright. 

But, it didn’t happen without any discussion: 

Eisav replied, “I am going to die; so why do I need this birthright?” (Bereishis 25:32)

Eisav asked [Ya’akov], “What is the nature of this service?” He replied, “There are many prohibitions and punishments and death penalties involved with it”… He (Eisav) said, “I am going to die because of it (i.e., the birthright); if so, why should I want it?” (Rashi)

But then the Torah adds something that really seems superfluous here: 

And Ya’akov gave Eisav bread and a pottage of lentils, and he ate and drank and arose and left, and Eisav despised the birthright. (Bereishis 25:34)

Despised the birthright? Why? Ya’akov freed him of it, took the responsibility off of his shoulders. If he had to feel anything at that time, should it not have been relief? 

It is reminiscent of the Amnon and Tamar episode. Amnon was so lovesick for Tamar that he feigned sickness to trap her and force his way with her. But, it says, after he did his terrible deed, he didn’t just reject Tamar, but “his hate for her was greater than the love he had for her” (II Shmuel 13). 

We can understand that after Amnon “conquered” Tamar than his infatuation ended. That’s how infatuation works. But despise her more than he originally “loved” her? How does that work? 

Because, Amnon knew that he had done a very lowly thing, that he had disgraced himself acting the way he had. At that point, he had a choice to do teshuvah and try and make amends somewhat, like marrying Tamar as she begged him knowing her chances of marrying another were slim. Or, he could defend himself and make her the bad person. The navi tells us which path he chose, and it cost him his life after Tamar’s brother avenged his sister by killing Amnon.

Likewise, Eisav, after selling the birthright knew inside that he had given up something important, and it made him feel bad about himself. So, rather than regret his actions and try to rectify what he had done, he chose to defend himself and blame the birthright for the way he felt. He projected his self-disgust onto the birthright instead.

What’s so Chanukah-ish about that? The Bnei Yissachar says that the Ohr HaGanuz is inside the 36 candles of Chanukah, but all I ever see is clear olive oil, a wick, and a flame burning from it. But, if you “look” closer with your mind’s eye, you will see a metaphor for what a person should be like. The jar of oil is a person’s body, and the flame is the soul that burns and illuminates from within it. 

The message? Be as “clear” as the oil that you can see right through. “Tocho k’boro,” the Gemara calls it, when a person is the same on the inside as on the outside. It’s all about self-honesty, about being in touch with our inner truth and letting that illuminate our world and the world of others. Only then can we truly be who we are and meant to be, which opens the door to a much closer relationship with God and all the benefits that come along with it. 

Latest book published: Derech Eretz, about how “good manners” is a lot more important to world rectification than people think, and Chanukah Forever, my latest effort to better understand the depth and centrality of the holiday of Chanukah. Both are available through Amazon, and anyone interesting making a dedication in either book can still do it. Write to pinchasw@thirtysix.org. 

Have a great Shabbos,

Pinchas Winston

Reb Neuberger: Toldos - The Lamps are Going Out

 

THE LAMPS ARE GOING OUT

This week's Parsha introduces us to the mighty conflict between Yaakov and Esav, a conflict which reverberates to this day throughout the world. "Hashem said to [Rivka], 'Two nations are in your womb, two regimes from your insides ... the might shall pass from one ... to the other and the elder shall serve the younger.'"
The Parsha ends with these words: "So Esav went to Yishmoel and took Mahalath, the daughter of Yishmoel son of Avraham ... as a wife for himself." And so, darkness deepened with the union of Yishmoel and Esav. I quoted last week the amazing words of the Malbim on the final war of history, in which Yishmoel and Esav will unite to attack their "brother" Yaakov. My friends, with the results of the U. S. elections before our eyes, we see all these mighty prophesies coming to pass. Great darkness is descending upon the world. The dawn will not come until the world is changed into a place which does not resemble the world of today. In the portentous words of Sir Edward Grey, "The lamps are going out all over Europe; we shall not see them lit again in our lifetime." (British Foreign Secretary on the eve of World War I) How typical that Vice President Vance blamed the Republican catastrophe on Israel. Is this not the way of the world: "Everything is Israel's fault." Are these not the words of Esav in this week's Parsha? "He took away my birthright and now he took away my blessing!" And the Torah continues, "Now Esav harbored hatred toward Yaakov ... and thought, 'May the days of mourning for my father draw near; then I will kill my brother Yaakov.'" And so throughout history: we are considered the root of evil! How reminiscent of the days when Hitler - ymak shemo! - was amassing power. When the nations speak like this, we know that the next war is brewing, and, in this coming war, there will not be daled amos in the world where that war will not reach. But the end is clear. Look in this week's Haftarah, where Hashem spells it out through His Servant Malachi: "I loved Yaakov, but I hated Esav! I made his mountains a desolation and his heritage for the desert serpents.... So said Hashem, Master of Legions, 'They may build but I shall tear down ... the people who infuriated Hashem to eternity...." It is happening now. Not tomorrow, but today! My friends, America was once great, but its day has passed. We are approaching the end of history, when mighty nations will be reduced to dust. As we said last week, quoting Haftaras Lech Lecha, Hashem says, "Behold, I have made you a new sharp threshing tool with many blades. You shall thresh mountains and grind them small and make the hills like chaff ... The wind will carry them off; the storm will scatter them ... but you will rejoice in Hashem!" The moment at which a culture says, "All our troubles are because of Israel," is the moment when that country has plunged into the abyss from which there is no escape. Every civilization - except l'havdil Am Yisroel! - has its end. We have to open our eyes and understand. "During Shacharis on a morning close to the end of his life, Rav Chaim Volozhiner suddenly burst into heart-wrenching sobs .... The prayers over, Reb Chaim entered his private study.... The students appointed Reb David Tevel to enter ... and hear from Reb Chaim ... the cause of his distress. Reb David entered with trepidation and, in a quavering voice, told Reb Chaim how the Yeshiva was gripped with fear as a result of his sobbing .... Reb Chaim turned to Reb David and said, 'You should know, my son, that the day will come when the pillars of European Jewry will topple, when the yeshivos will be destroyed and uprooted. However, they will be reborn in the exile of America, the final stop of the Jewish people before the arrival of Moshiach. The American exile will be the tenth and final exile of Torah, following those of Babylon, North Africa, Egypt, Italy, Spain, France, Germany, Poland and Lithuania...." (Dare to Dream, published by Agudath Israel of American, 2003) My friends, this is the final stop. One door is closing and another is opening. The journey will not be easy, but the end is in sight. "The earth was astonishingly empty, with darkness upon the surface of the deep... [But] the Divine presence hovered upon the .... waters [and] Hashem said, 'Let there be light.'" (Beraishis 1:1-3) There will be a Great Light. May we see it soon with our own eyes! PICTURE CAPTION The lamps are going out NO GLOSSARY

Rabbi Wein: Parashat Toldot

Toldot

The Torah emphasizes to us the importance of the continuity of generations in this week’s parsha. The name alone by which the parsha is called – “toldot” – generations, testifies to the stress that the Torah places on this vision in Jewish life. My wise old Talmud teacher said to his class: “Boys, if your grandparents and your grandchildren are both proud of you and your achievements, then probably Heaven is also satisfied with you.”


Sixty years later I fully comprehend at last the import of his words. Midrash teaches us that Abraham died earlier than the destined amount of the years of his life so that he would not have to witness the betrayal of his life style and value system by his grandson Esau.


I believe that there is nothing more shattering to family life and personal serenity than the fracturing of familial tradition. Jewish life always prided itself on the continuity of generations. It was the cement that bound the small, persecuted people of Israel together in all of the lands of its dispersion. It also was, and is, its dissolution that heralded the breakup of the Jewish home and the wave of assimilation and intermarriage that has now engulfed much of Jewish society.


The pressures of modern life, of mobility and geographical distance have contributed to this fraying of generational continuity. Basically, it is the weakening of individual commitment to family and generational continuity that has contributed to this situation. Family generational continuity somehow is no longer the priority that it once was in many Jewish homes and societies.


Our mother Rebecca recognized that her eldest son Esau was a danger to the generational continuity which is the foundation upon which a Jewish nation is founded. Unfortunately, as every school teacher can testify, the survival of educational progress relies on a system of triage. Not everyone can and should be entitled to attend graduate school or become a brain surgeon.


The same is true in the spiritual world. Not everyone is entitled to proclaim one’s self a kabbalist, a halachic decisor, or a holy person. Not everyone is cut out to spend an entire day studying Talmud, as admirable and necessary as such an occupation is. Because Joseph was so beloved by their father, the brothers feared that the disagreement with Joseph, which was based on the triage that eliminated Yishmael and Esau from Abraham’s and Isaac’s family, would also eliminate them.


They were well aware of the process of triage that seemingly dominates Jewish generational continuity. Perhaps this is one of the causes of the low numbers in the Jewish population. And, therefore, the problem of generational continuity is a touchy, delicate and mostly painful process. And it changes from place to place, time to time, and generation to generation.


That is why the Torah always portrays our future as an uncertain one – with barren mothers, fathers threatened by outside enemies who covet their wives and assets, and the difficulties of raising children in an unwholesome environment. And that is why “toldot” somehow remains the key to Jewish survival and success.


Shabat shalom.

Rabbi Berel Wein


Reprinted from 5771

Reb Sones: Jewish Home Newsletter

 


Rabbi Winston: Parashas Toldos

  ONLY 21 DAYS until Chanukah, b”H.  I’m not exactly sure why but, of all the  chagim , Chanukah speaks to me the most. Every year I feel an...