Reb Neuberger: Parshas Toldos

 FOR THE SAKE OF MY BROTHERS AND FRIENDS

Last Shabbos we read about the leviah of our Mother Sarah. A few days later, I attended the leviah of one of her great descendants, a tzaddik who exemplified the traits of Avraham Avinu and Sarah Imeinu.

 

Rabbi Yehoshua Kalish zt”l was more than a rav, more than a rebbe, more than a tal-mid chacham; he was beloved by hundreds and thousands of Jews around the world. The word “unique” is frequently used, but Rabbi Kalish was indeed unique. He brought warmth and achdus to this world, because of his overwhelming love for the Ribono shel Olam and all Yidden. In turn, he was greatly beloved by thousands of talmidim and baal-ei baatim.

 

We ate several seudos on Shabbos at the Kalishes’ table. Immediately after bentching, Rabbi Kalish started singing. I believe he sang this song after every seuda. What were the words?

 

“Thank you very much! Thank you very much! Thank you, thank you very much!”

 

On and on he sang. This song was for his Rebbetzin. She knew that she was beloved, but, even more than that, she knew that she was appreciated. Appreciation builds people up. Rabbi Kalish built people. He saw their kedusha.

 

After every seudah he sang this song. Think about this. Doesn’t it tell you something? Is this a mussar shmooze or not?

 

At the leviah, someone mentioned in a hesped that the Rabbi and Rebbetzin “did everything together.” Their one-ness was legendary. They reminded us that Am Yisroel is one, and from there we remember that Hashem is One, and that we are one entity with Hashem. All these deep nuances affect the entire world. Rabbi Kalish sent ripples around the world.

 

At his leviah I experienced something new. Following the hespedim, everyone broke out in song, everyone! It was an old and beloved Shlomo Carlebach niggun. We all know it. “L’ma’an achai veraiay, L’ma’an achai veraiay ….. For the sake of my brothers and friends, I shall speak of peace …. I shall request your good.” (Tehillim 122)

 

As hundreds of people sang this song, hundreds of tears fell. The Gates of Heaven opened. Was this Rabbi Kalish’s favorite song? Maybe. I don’t know. But it could have been, because that was Rabbi Kalish: he was everyone’s brother and friend; he spoke of peace and brought peace, and he requested good for every Yid. That was Rabbi Kalish.

 

He was always on the lookout for some chessed he could perform. He was a shul rav for decades, but – please listen carefully – he was always careful not to burden others, not to impose himself. He was an ish anav meod. I know firsthand that his drashas never exceeded seven minutes! He took seriously his responsibility not to burden his kehilla, or anyone else.

 

When rabbonim came from Israel to collect tzedakah he would personally take them around and introduce them to potential donors.

 

Once a year, on Purim, the accordion would come out. He would sing and smile and spread achdus, in the spirit of Esther ha Malka. That is our secret. “Go, assemble all the Jews ….” (Esther 4:16) That is how we prevail and become the Holy Nation!

 

It is legendary that Rabbi Kalish learned seven daf a day and completed Shas every year. In order to accomplish his avoda in ruchnius, he kept himself fit. He loved to bicycle around Yerushalayim; he described to me his joy sailing down the hills. He took care of himself so he could take care of others.

 

Last year, my wife and I spoke Motzae Shabbos in Lawrence after the publication of a book about us by Rabbi Nachman Seltzer. We had long since made aliyah and I was no longer a member of his shul. But Rabbi Kalish showed up at our lecture. He did not “have” to be there, but he came to bring simcha to us. As I said, he built people up. I was his “brother and friend.”

 

OY! How we need such people, people who break down the barriers and spread the achdus that we need to survive and flourish in this world. He was a Shas Yid above all, but he knew that the Torah was given at Har Sinai “k’ish echad b’lev echad.” The Torah was given to a Nation that stood united.

 

We need to learn from Rabbi Kalish. The world is united in hatred against us. If we are united in love amongst ourselves, then the glory of Hashem will shine on earth, the Torah will go forth from Yerushalayim and the hatred will dissipate.

 

The Tzaddik is now in Gan Eden, where he was certainly accorded a welcome befitting a heroic son of Avraham Avinu and Sarah Imeinu. May Hashem give us strength to follow his example and bring the fire of Torah down to earth.

 

“L’maan achai veraiay …. For the sake of my brothers and friends…. Hashem will give might to His nation, Hashem will bless His nation with peace.”

 

May we see it soon in our days!

Maaras haMachpela

Rabbi Kalish with the author

Rabbis Forst, Brafman and Kalish

GLOSSARY

Achdus: unity

Avodah: spiritual labor

Baalei Batim: heads of Jewish households

Bentching: the blessing after a meal

Chessed: acts of kindness

Daf: page of Gemara (talmud)

Drasha: sermon

Hesped: eulogy for a deceased person

Ish anav meod: a very humble person

Kedusha: holiness

Kehilla: congregation

Leviah: funeral

Mussar shmuess: Jewish ethical teaching

Niggun: Jewish spiritual melody

Ribono shel Olam: The Master of the World, G-d

Seuda (pl. seudos): Shabbos or Yom Tov meals

Shas: The entire Talmud

Tzaddik: Holy person

Yidden: Jews

Yom Tov: Jewish Holiday